What I wish I Knew When We Got the Diagnosis

 

💙 What I Wish I Knew When We Got the Diagnosis

I remember the day vividly. The sterile room. The quiet hum of fluorescent lights. The way the doctor’s words seemed to float above me, as if they were meant for someone else. Autism Spectrum Disorder. It felt like the ground shifted beneath me.

If I could go back and sit beside myself in that moment, here’s what I’d say:

1. This Is Not the End—It’s a Beginning

You’ll grieve. That’s okay. You’ll question everything. That’s normal. But this diagnosis isn’t a closing chapter—it’s the start of understanding your child more deeply than you ever imagined. You’re not losing anything. You’re gaining clarity.

2. Your Child Is Still Your Child

Nothing about your child changed in that moment. The sparkle in their eyes, the way they flap their hands when excited, the giggle that erupts when they see bubbles—none of that disappears. The diagnosis doesn’t define them. It helps you support them.

3. You’ll Become an Advocate, Researcher, Therapist, and Warrior

You’ll learn acronyms you never wanted to know—IEP, OT, ABA. You’ll sit in meetings and fight for services. You’ll read late into the night, searching for answers. And you’ll do it all because love makes you fierce.

4. You’ll Need Support—And You Deserve It

You don’t have to do this alone. Find your people. Other moms who get it. Therapists who listen. Friends who show up. Let them in. Let them help. You are strong, but you don’t have to be invincible.

5. Progress Looks Different—Celebrate It Loudly

Maybe your child won’t speak in full sentences. Maybe eye contact is fleeting. But when they point to their favorite toy, or try a new food, or say “Mama” for the first time—you’ll feel joy that’s impossible to explain. These moments matter. They’re yours to treasure.

6. You’ll Grow in Ways You Never Expected

You’ll become more patient, more empathetic, more attuned to the world’s quiet details. You’ll learn to see beauty in difference, strength in struggle, and hope in the smallest gestures. You’ll be transformed.

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If you’re reading this and you’re newly diagnosed, I want you to know you’re not alone. You’re not broken. And your child is not less—they are uniquely, wonderfully themselves.

You’ve got this. And when you don’t, we’ve got you.